Untouchable
by Winter Snow1
Summary: *Revised* A short look at Amarant through the bounty hunter Lani. Her thoughts about him and her current state.


**_Untouchable_**

**_~Final Fantasy IX~_**

_Will I ever see him again…?****___

_My head hurts…             ****___

How did this happen?  I was fine earlier.  I'm thinking too much is all.  That's all it _must be.  But I can't stop it!  There are too many thoughts!  Too many!  And they all begin with __him… _

I remember the first time I saw him.  I had heard of him before.  Yes, long ago.  He's a legend in Treno.  He's an awful plague, more like it, but no one dares touch him.  Sure, I wouldn't dare touch him either.  Those muscles and that brooding look on his face… I shutter to think.  But he had been interesting... 

When the queen called me, I jumped at the chance.  I had never been hired by royalty before. I put a new feather in my head dress; I even polished my axe!  And when I arrived, there he was: standing there, looking exactly like he had on the wanted posters tacked on the wall of every bar in Treno.  He wore the same expression and only looked at me for a moment, before giving his attention to Queen Brahne.  I suppose if she had the money he had the time... or could it have been the challenge he was after?  Either way, he didn't seem too worried that I would beat him to the punch. 

I was thinking about the competition.  I was cocky about it.  Even after the audience with the queen, I wished him good luck and told him he would need it!  But he didn't even give me a sideways glance as he walked away.  The sauntering way he moved had me frozen for a few minutes.  He was menacing even with his back turned, but I couldn't let it get to me.  I was strong.  I would not be beaten! 

Then he followed me, he must have!  There's no way he had the skill I had to track that group of misfits!  He found me in this place, Madain Sari, and stole my glory!  He ruined my plan!  How could I let that happen?  I was afraid though.  I was afraid of him.  As much as I hate to admit that, I must, but only to myself.  His eyes were glowering down at me from his height.  I would not let him get close.  His gaze was freezing me in place, but I was no fool.  I knew I must keep moving.

I was not on his hit list, but he had no feelings for me, as he had no feelings for anyone else.  With a flick of his wrist, he would end the life of anyone who stood in his way.  I was not too much different, but I would never touch him.  He was much too powerful. 

And yet... at the same time... I felt close with his mind for a while.  It was as though I could see right through those staring eyes if I looked past my own reflection.  I could feel his tension and his regrets.  Even though I hide mine well, and he doesn't recognize his, we have exactly the same feelings.  We are both alone and really... we are scared.  Deep within our being we need much.  Our lives aren't complete!  I thought I was happy for a long time, but now I'm not so sure...  The more I think about his face, the fonder I grow of it.  Though he never smiled, I knew he couldn't be emotionless.  No one could be that heartless!  Could they?  Perhaps he really was and he would never open up.  I realized that.  I still do 

I've been thinking a lot lately about turning over a new leaf.  After my accident, I don't really think I need that life anymore. 

_Brrr__...I'm cold. _

This blanket isn't doing so much.  Perhaps I'm just sick.  My head still hurts, but I must say it is quiet here.  Perhaps I'll stay here... for a while.  I still can't stop thinking about him...  Perhaps I'll meet him again some day, but for now I am here until I recover.  I do however hope never to see that monkey or his friends again!  I would die of embarrassment!  No matter... 

One of these creatures approaches me now.  A moogle.  That's what I think they're called anyway.  They saved me and brought me back here.  I would have died.  I guess I owe them something...

The moogle hands me a bowl and makes a noise.  I suppose he wants me to drink it.  I take a sip and cringe.  It's very hot and there's a little too much of something in it that I can't put my finger on, but I'm so hungry!  I looked down into the cup.  The red liquid is the exact color of _his hair – Amarant.  I smile and nod a thank-you as I take another sip. _

You know, it really isn't that bad... 


End file.
